“What’s God’s Limit?”                                          Wk 3 in series : (Sermon: 1.24.10; Wellspring Church; Rev. J. Moschenrose )

1 John 1:9 , Mark 2:1-12

As Alfred settled in for the sermon time, he thought to himself: “I knew I shouldn’t have come here today.  I don’t need this.  I don’t need to be reminded of the fact that first of all, I don’t have anyone who cares about me like that paralytic guy had, and secondly, no matter what anyone else says, I know in the heart of my hearts that God will never forgive me for the depth of my sins.

I wonder if that paralytic guy knew how fortunate he was.  I mean, those four friends of his went way beyond the call of duty.  Only place I know that kind of thing happens is in the military.  My comrades and I treated one another that way.  We risked our lives for one another, walked the extra mile, were always there for each other. 

But that was a long time ago – lifetimes ago, in a manner of speaking.  What happened?  What happened to cause me to be who I have become?

If I had my life to do over, I would do a lot of things differently.  Famous last words, I guess – hindsight always offers 20/20 vision.  If I knew then what I know now, I would never have let myself slide so far in my habits and values.  But hanging out with guys who were in no hurry to grow up was easier than to accept responsibility and push myself to excel.   

Laziness and being satisfied with just getting through the day and living for weekend partying are easy habits to fall into.  A different girl at every bar, waking up anywhere but home, just sliding through killing time, with little purpose and no goals.  That pretty much sums up my 20’s.

Then I hit 30 and realized that I rally oughta settle down.  Got married, had a kid and a decent-paying job.  But I didn’t really settle down.  Some of what happened in my 20’s took hold of me and wouldn’t let go.  Specifically drinking and women.  I just couldn’t give that up.  Why?  The pleasure is so short lived.  I’d wake up feeling terrible.  And not proud of myself.  The wife figured out some of what I was doing and said I needed to find God.  So I went to church and did my best to find God.  I went through all the motions they suggested – not that I believed everything they said.  But I said the prayer asking forgiveness and reconciliation and was baptized and joined the wife’s church. 

But nothing changed inside of me.  I could act the part when in church, but outside of church Al was still Al.  And the ladies had my number, and the bar was right there on the road between work and home and when the guys from work stopped for a few on the way home, there I was, pulling into the parking lot right behind them.

So I missed the kid’s games and whatever else happened after school.  By the time I got home he was in bed.  The wife would complain, I’d do whatever – yell or make up excuses or leave in a rage.   Sometimes I felt bad and would say I’m sorry and that I’ll do better.  I’d go to church anytime the kid would have a special program or whatever, and would confess my sins, as the preacher called it.  And sometimes I meant it.  I wasn’t proud of who I was.  I just felt caught in a haze of existence.  I simply and only survived day by day.  Work, drink myself into a state and behavior for which I was not responsible, go home, sleep it off, get up and repeat.  That was my 30’s.

Somewhere along in there – not exactly sure where or when - the wife got tired of my empty promises and apologies and left with the kid.  I don’t blame her – I mean, everyone has their limits.  She had given me more chances to get my stuff together than any of us can count.  And every time I told her I was sorry, every time I promised the kid I’d pick him up or take him somewhere, they tried to believe me, and then I’d mess up.  I wonder if that’s what my name means.  “Alfred: big screw-up.’  Yup, if I’m the one to give my name meaning, that’s the meaning I’ve given it.

Then I turned 40, and that’s when my life really fell apart.  When I was sober I realized what a failure I was as a person.  So I tried to spend as little time as possible being sober.  Everyone had left me – the wife, the kid.  My parents and family wanted nothing to do with me, they were so disgusted.  Eventually I even lost my job and the legal right to drive. 

The bottom hit for me when I became homeless.  That’s when I went into a program that offered the support I needed to rebuild my life.  And since then I’ve had my ups and downs, but I am making slow, fairly steady progress.  I’m sober for a while now, but that’s still not easy.  I have a lot of anger toward myself about the years I wasted.  I’m so angry at myself about the relationships I destroyed. 

And yet here I am today, sitting in church, having been invited by the ex to see my son get baptized.  At least she’s done well with the kid – he seems to be turning out great despite having me as a father.  I look at him and think, “how did he grow up so fast?”  Dang, one day she’s pregnant, the next he’s taller than me.  I blew so many chances to be with him when he was younger.  And there’s not a thing I can do to get those years back. 

Interesting that they chose to read about a paralyzed man today when I’m here.  I’ve spent the last 20-some years being paralyzed by the bad decisions I made.  The biggest difference between him and me is that I don’t have four friends in this whole world who care enough about me to go to that much trouble to get me healed.  All my friends baled on me.  Or died or are in the gutter or are who knows where. 

I noticed that the story says that Jesus healed the man because of the faith of his friends.  Jesus didn’t heal the paralytic because of the paralytic’s faith – but because of the faith of his friends.  I wonder – I wonder if there is anyone here in this room who would go to that much trouble for another person here in this room.  In other words, do any of you care this much for your brothers and sisters in Christ that you would go way out of your way to bring that brother or sister to Christ for healing?  Because, you see, I understand something about that paralyzed man.  I understand that he probably doesn’t believe that Jesus would or could possibly heal him.  He has given up hope.”

A lot of people have given up hope.  Alfred’s not that unusual – there’s a lot of people out there who have given up hope of ever being healed by Jesus.  Maybe some of those people are right here in this room.  Maybe they are sitting right next to you – you don’t know – they act all right outwardly, but you don’t know what is going in deep inside of them.

Churches are good about saying the right things.  They sing praises to God, they read the Bible to one another, they give their money and their talents to God’s work.  I’ve got to ask you, though: Do you do the right things once you are outside these church walls?  Do you do as the friends of the paralytic did – do you do everything in your power to bring those who are paralyzed to Jesus for healing?  I hope so.  I sincerely hope so.

Alfred continued deep in thought.  “I wonder if I am the only one here who has trouble believing the words to the song the choir sang today.  There is no evading them – they are printed right in the bulletin.  I will forgive your mistake about writing God as little “g”.  There’s nothing little g about God.  But then it says in the second verse, “…release our demons; open our eyes to see the shame within, our guilt and pain.  Mend us, make us whole.”  In the third verse they sang, “Calm the storm within.”  And in the last you all hit the nail on the head – “Come now, O God of second chances; may we forgive ourselves, may we become your living sign: Children of God’s love.”

Now that’s deep.  Pay attention to those powerful words, because there is a message there that all of us need to hear.  Some of us struggle more than others to forgive ourselves and accept forgiveness from God.  People like Alfred need to rely on the faith of their friends – the faith of our brothers and sisters in Christ, to bring healing to our bodies and our souls.  Will you be that kind of friend?  Will you pray people like Alfred into healing and restoration, no matter how many decades that takes?  Will you show by YOUR forgiving spirit that God indeed can and will forgive once, twice, a hundred, a thousand times – however many times it takes to turn their lives around?  Will you be a child of God’s love?  Only then will others be able to believe that God is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Let’s pray about these things.     

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